I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
