I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
