my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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