it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
