You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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