He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize