I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
