You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
