yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
you mean i was at the winter classic?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
