Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
