He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
