Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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