i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
