respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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