I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Randomize
