I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
