i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize