I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
