Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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