dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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