How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
