but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
