North Korea, Best Korea!
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Someone shattered a urinal.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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