I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
