I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
