i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
