exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
