i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
organizing the empties. That sober.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
