Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
