Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
