ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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