i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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