I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Someone shit on the floor
I think I am morally bankrupt
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
