Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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