...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize