Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
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