please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
