You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
