Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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