Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
