How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
