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This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
