It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
