Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
