Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
