I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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