hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
