well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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