bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
