all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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